Hi, i’m Cristina!

I help parents of preschoolers (aged 3 to 6) who want to gentle parent, but often feel judged and unsupported, by reassuring them that they don’t have to be perfect and giving them the tools to be able to raise their children with kindness instead of fear, while simultaneously focusing on self-compassion and the knowledge that being a good parent 51% of the time is already awesome.

I’m an imperfect mom to a preschooler, who has been and continues being my biggest teacher. I’m also:

  • a certified Positive Discipline Parent Educator by the Positive Discipline Association
  • a certified Positive Discipline Early Childhood Educator by the Positive Discipline Association
  • a certified Encouragement Consultant (Personal Growth through Positive Disicipline) by Lynn Lott (the co-founder of Positive Discipline)
  • currently pursuing an accreditation as Mindfulness for Children Practitioner by the International Mindfuflness & Meditation Alliance

Here is how it all started …

That all drastically changed when I became a mom. I was still in the maternity ward, my son had just been born and I was already feeling judged by so many different people who had all sorts of advice and felt the need to tell me everything I was “doing wrong” in their perspective. Everyone was so focused on preventing me from “spoiling” a little baby who had just been born and was still scared of this new world. I knew in my heart that these were the worst advices I had ever heard in my life but the way they were said still felt so judgmental to me (“oh you can’t do that otherwise you will spoil him”).

Even complete strangers in the supermarket felt the need to stare at our struggles as new parents and make unkind remarks. I felt more judged in my son’s first month of life than I had felt my whole life before I became a mom.

I honestly started thinking I wasn’t made to be a mom, I just couldn’t deal with all the judgement. That on top of me feeling exhausted from the lack of sleep that my body wasn’t used to, and not having any time for even basic needs, like taking a bath, was really taking a toll on me.

I had to learn how to impose new boundaries with other people and step into this role of being a mom when I was around other people, which wasn’t easy for me.

But, although the nights were very long, somehow that first year went by really fast . As they say, the days are long and the years are so short…

Then, by the time my son was about 1 year old, we slowly started experiencing his first behavioral challenges and, with that, the ciriticism and judgement also started becoming more and more pronounced. I found it harder and harder to go out in public with my son. I dreaded every time he started a tantrum in public because of all the stares and unkind remarks from other people. It felt like everything my son did that was seen by others as “bad” behaviour was our fault as parents, and everything he did that was seen as “good” behaviour was because he was such a good kid.

And I also noticed that in my overwhelmed emotional state, I was becoming a screaming mom. There he was, the person I loved the most in the world, needing parental guidance and I was feeling so triggered that all I could do was scream “No” all the time. I didn’t want to be a screaming mom. I love my son, I wanted to be a mom that supports through love and connection, not someone my little kid was scared of in those moments he needed my help the most. I knew that he was dealing with new emotions and needed help navigating and understanding this new world he was starting to explore. But I was overwhelmed with my own emotions, I was tired and I didn’t know what else to do.

And all the judging and bad advice I was getting, was really bringing me to my limits. I wanted to raise my child with love and connection and people kept telling me things like “a slap on the wrist doesn’t hurt and they learn No” or “kids are naughty and they try and fool you, you can’t give in, otherwise you will spoil him”. I knew that this was all bad advice. I knew that I wanted to raise my son in a different way, I knew in my heart that he was just a baby needing love and guidance. But I also didn’t know what to do instead. And I just felt so judged and misunderstood all the time.

So I decided to learn how to be a parent. I realized that I had spent all my life learning all sorts of things, but no one had actually ever taught me how to be a parent, which is, in my opinion, the most important job I’ll ever have in my life. And I found it surreal that parents are just supposed to know how to parent overnight as if, on the day we become parents, we were magically enlightened with an encyclopedia of knowledge on childhood development, children safety, SIDS and all the other million things that are involved with parenting a child. How aren’t we taught this in school?

So you might be asking yourself, “After all this learning, did you stop feeling judged?” No… But now I know how to self-regulate myself, I know how to ignore the noise of all the “advice” and focus on what I know is the right way to parent my child.

And you can too! I know you are doubting yourself “I can’t do this”, “what if they are right and I am spoiling my child?”, “It’s just too hard”.

And I know you love your child more than anything in the world and that you want to parent though love and connection, you don’t think your child is evil or deceitful, you know they are loving and kind and just little kids who need love and guidance.

I’m here to help you, you can do this! You just need support, encouragement and the right tools.

Come join me!